I began searching for what I wanted to do at a young age; like everybody else. When I was 7, I wanted to be a veterinarian. When I was 13, I wanted to be a marine biologist. When I was 18, I thought I might be a nurse. From 18 to 22 I searched for fulfillment. I searched for a way to see everything as beautiful. I began noticing moments. Moments would fly by and no one would be the wiser as to what they just missed. In the pursuit of seeing and living life in its fullness I began photographing people and moments with my iPhone 3. My friends became my models and my memories became masterpieces. Well, at least in my opinion they were. 

 

I got a real camera about a year and a half later. I started out small. I photographed a wedding. I met the couple two days before the wedding. After having decided that they were awesome, they invited me to spend time with the wedding party the day before the wedding and go canoeing. Photographing their wedding and going on an adventure cemented our friendship. I meet really cool people. It's just one of the many perks of being a photographer. 

 

I have photographed a couple birthdays; the sweet sixteen was my favorite. Everyone danced the thriller, had fun in the photo booth, and ended the night singing Phillip Phillips songs by the fire. 

 

 I take great pleasure in seeing, understanding, and loving people. That's why I'm a photographer. 

I get to see the unique, normally unseen, absolutely wonderful things that life is full of. 

 

Some people would say that pursuing photography, with the economy in the state that it is,

is a little dangerous. 

 

"I laugh in the face of danger. Ha ha ha ha!! "- Simba, The Lion King. 

 

I don't laugh in it's face, but I'll give it a run for its money. Art may not seem essential, 

but art is quite sensual in the way that it calls out to you; to you specifically. Art reaches down into your soul and awakens you to what is possible. Art is the courage drink that your soul soaks up and recognizes what dreams look like. Art is one person living courageously calling out to you to do the same.  

 

Of course that’s just one part of my life. But I’m a photographer in every way. I study people’s faces. I know this because my friends have told me that they catch me staring at them. Because of being a watcher I’ve had short bursts of conversations with complete strangers, telling them that they have a bomb jaw line or that they’re beautiful. 

 

In the midst of the life and trying to find myself I found myself in the middle of student ministry, working with high school students. That’s where I first got to be crazy transparent and instead of scaring people with the vulnerability, my high school girls were drawn to my honesty. We’ve all learned that if there’s one thing I definitely am, it’s honest. 

 

A lot of things happen while in the midst of other things; that’s life I suppose. Well, while in the midst of loving all these wonderful high schoolers I began experiencing more and more health problems. I was honest about them with my high schoolers and was soon overcome with pride in my little sisters and brothers and thankfulness for them when they started requesting prayer for me in their schools and in prayer at youth group. 

 

I’d become so close with these kids, that I thought of them all throughout my days and often thinking of them was what God used to give me joy. Seeing them grow was such a joyful experience for me and still is. 

 

But in April of 2016 my family moved and that alone was hard but during that time of moving and since, my health has gotten much worse. So now I live in a new place, sans community, and being sick and having little energy makes it hard to find friends. No one expects a 25 year old to have severe muscle and joint pain and pain is scary because people often want to fix things and when they realize they can’t, they just don’t know what to say. 

 

I don’t even know what to say, so how can I expect anyone else to. 

 

Living in a world of undiagnosed chronic illness/pain is a new thing for me. My whole life I’ve been a writer. It’s how I get my thoughts out, how I gain different perspective, and how I find the silver linings. Luckily for me I have help finding them. 

 

I have a wonderful family that is always there for me, little sisters who love all of me, friends who challenge me, love me, support me, and rant with me. 

 

Life is hard. We get overwhelmed by emotions, feel lost, feel alone, and feel everything. 

 

We can be lost together. If you hold my hand, I’ll hold yours, and we can walk this road together. 

 

Yours sincerely, 

 

The Undefeated